Articles

How Do I Get Child Custody in A California Divorce Case?

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Thu, 10 May 2012 19:10:33 +0000

The California Child Custody Court Process

California’s court process regarding child custody litigation can be very expensive, as well as lengthy. More importantly, contested child custody proceedings are hardly ever in the child’s best interest. Since the California Superior Court prefers to have custody and visitation issues decided outside of the courtroom and in a nonadversary manner, the parent’s family law attorney should encourage their clients to try and settle child custody and child visitation issues outside of the court. With the assistance of a California family law lawyer, an agreement is often possible. If there is no settlement outside of court, the parties must then also pursue mediation before the issue(s) may proceed to a hearing. The mediation recommendation is given much weight in the decision making process of the court.

If no child custody and visitation settlement can be reached in mediation, many individuals with this type of family law matter want to evaluate their chance of success in court during a hearing on child custody and visitation. In trying to determine if they will win at their hearing, parties should be advised by their family law lawyer about the basic parameters which will guide the court’s decision. These variables include the following:

Maintenance of status quo. Usually courts are reluctant to upset the custodial arrangement which is in place prior to the hearing, especially with young children. Unless the other party can show there is a detriment to the children, the court will favor maintenance of the status quo. For example, if the children have been living with the mom since separation and prior to the hearing, the court will most often keep this arrangement intact.

Willingness to accommodate other parent's rights. A parent who insists on keeping the children away from the other parent is likely to face an uphill battle. Unless the children's health, safety and welfare would be undermined, custody orders must be made to assure the children frequent and continuing contact with both parents. Thus, except in cases of threatened child endangerment, a custody fight should not be pursued with the intent to thwart the children's relationship with the other parent.

Child's preferences. Clients should also consider their children's wishes, particularly if they are teenagers. The court is likely to do the same and may give their preferences great weight.

Domestic violence factor. A domestic violence perpetrator is unlikely to find a fair playing field in trying to get a custody award. The law presumes such a parent is not suitable for a sole or joint custody award.

Immediate risk of harm or removal prerequisite to ex parte custody/visitation orders. Custody and visitation orders cannot be made or modified on an ex parte basis absent a showing of immediate harm to the child or immediate risk the child will be removed from the state. Immediate harm to the child includes, but is not limited to, situations where (a) a parent has committed acts of domestic violence and the court determines those acts are of recent origin or part of a demonstrated and continuing pattern of acts of domestic violence, or (b) there has been sexual abuse of the child and the court determines the acts of sexual abuse are of recent origin or part of a demonstrated and continuing pattern of acts of sexual abuse. Failure to provide adequate child supervision justifies ex parte order changing custody. However, whether there is a sufficient showing of immediate harm is really a judgment call that is subject to vastly different judicial interpretations. Generally, ex parte custody orders are extremely difficult to get.

The court’s bottom line in determining custody is in maintaining the child’s best interest, and that determination is left mostly to the trial court’s discretion. The law allows courts to choose a parenting plan that is in the child's best interest; and the trial court's decision will be upheld on appeal so long as it reasonably can be concluded that the order is in the child's best interest.

An experienced Fresno family law attorney can give you more specific details on your child custody issues.

What is the Definition of California Child Support

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Thu, 10 May 2012 15:03:22 +0000

California Child Support Defined

Here in California, the Family Code says that child “support” refers to a support obligation owing on behalf of a child or an amount owing to a county for reimbursement of public assistance paid on behalf of a child. It also includes past-due support and arrearages; and, for children owed a duty of support, includes “maintenance and education.”

There is the general obligation of both parents to support their minor children “in the manner suitable to the child's circumstances.” Also, a parent's first and principal obligation is to support his or her minor children according to the parent's circumstances and station in life. California family law also requires that “both parents are mutually responsible for the support of their children,” and that “all minor children of the parents are owed a statutory duty of support.”

The child support obligation is not tied to the parents' marital status; nor is it limited to biological offspring. Even same-sex “partners” may be a child's parents, both of whom thus owe a child support duty. In addition, the child of a wife cohabiting at time of conception with her husband, who is not impotent or sterile, is “conclusively” presumed to be a child of the marriage. However, this presumption is inapplicable where the spouses were not living together as husband and wife at time of conception. And with the “sterility exception,” a husband may dispute this otherwise conclusive presumption at any time by proving he was impotent or sterile at the time of conception. Another exception is the “blood test exception,” where conclusive presumption may also be challenged by requesting blood tests within two years of the child's birth. Blood tests offered to defeat the presumption must be ordered by the court and performed by court-appointed experts; otherwise, the tests have no legal significance regardless of the results. Further, blood test evidence may be used to overcome the presumption only if the motion for blood tests is filed within two years of the child's birth.

An experienced Fresno family law attorney can give you more details about how child support obligations can affect you, considering the facts in your situation. In Fresno County, you may want to consult with a Fresno family law lawyer to find out how to go about filing papers properly in the Fresno County Superior Court.

When Does the Marital Relationship Actually End?

( ) — Thu, 02 Dec 2010 13:58:46 +0000

One question that is often asked, and is very crucial in a divorce case is “when did the relationship actually end?” The answer to that question can have a significant impact on tens, or hundreds of thousands, or even millions of potential community or separate property dollars.

California law states that “earnings and accumulations” of the parties living separate and apart is that respective party’s separate property. So the date the marital relationship ends (known as the “date of separation”) can be very important in determining what is separate property.

Over the years there have been several Court decisions which have held that, even though the spouses did not live with each other or have sexual relations, their actions (e.g., going on vacations together, sending Christmas cards, going to social and sporting events together) preserved the appearance of the marriage, such that the accumulations and earnings of the spouses during that period of time would remain community property.

Since then, the courts have held that even the filing of the divorce petition is not necessarily conclusive proof of the date of separation. The courts have defined the issue as whether either or both of the parties perceived the rift in their relationship as final, and that the best evidence of this is their words and actions. In other words, the parties need to have a subjective understanding that their marriage is over, manifested by outward actions. Where the parties do not have a clear understanding that their marital relationship is over, and their overt acts create any ambiguity, then the date of separation may not be all that clear.

The bottom line is, parties to a divorce can continue to be cordial to each other, and attend family or parental functions, but to be on the safe side, they should do something to memorialize their understanding that the relationship is over (e.g., sending emails, voice messages, letter), and to demonstrate their true intent. To protect yourself, consult with a qualified divorce attorney to ensure you are taking the proper steps.

The Divorce Process A to Z

( ) — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 09:28:52 +0000

How do we handle divorce cases at
The Law Offices of Rick D. Banks?

While every case is different, and not all cases require each of the steps outlined below, this is a list of what we normally do at our firm when preparing your divorce case, and, if necessary, trying the case.

Initial client interview: evaluate the client's case, educate client regarding the legal process for divorce cases, and determine any deadlines that apply.

Contact the opposing party or their attorney, giving them notice of our representation.

File the divorce petition and serve the opposing party, or answer the divorce petition filed by the opposing party.

Serve discovery requests(formal requests for documents and other information regarding assets, debts, child custody issues, history of the opposing party, etc.) on the opposing party or their attorney.

Answer any discovery requests served on our client by the opposing party.

Gather all evidence related to the case, including assets, debts, marital history and child custody issues.

Interview witnesses, if appropriate.

Obtain testimony from the opposing party and any other witnesses as necessary via deposition.

Analyze the legal issues related to the case, including financial and custody issues.

Prepare for any temporary orders which may be needed to govern the conduct of the parties while the case is pending and conduct a hearing regarding such orders if necessary.

Prepare client for court-ordered mediation if child custody and/or child visitation issues cannot be settled.

If mediation is unsuccessful, set the case for trial.

Prepare exhibits to be used at trial.

Prepare and file any necessary briefs and motions with the court.

Prepare the client and any witnesses for trial.

Try the case before a judge.

Review the court’s rulings to see if either party has grounds for appeal.

Advise the client as to whether or not they should appeal the case (note that our contract with you does not obligate us to appeal your case).

How do we start the divorce process?

A divorce is a civil lawsuit, and it begins like any other civil lawsuit. We prepare a "petition" asking for a divorce. We file this petition, along with a “summons” with the court clerk's office in the appropriate county. Then, have the opposing party served with the summons and petition.

If the other side files the suit and serves you with the summons and petition, we prepare an "answer" which we file with the court clerk and then serve on the opposing party. It does not matter who files for divorce first and there is no advantage to being the "first one to the courthouse". However, remember that once you are served, you must file an answer within a certain time in order to prevent the other side from seeking a "default judgment" against you.

The parties usually will need "temporary orders" to be entered with the court to govern their behavior and/or to establish support amounts and/or set custody/visitation arrangements while the divorce is pending. These orders can be negotiated by the parties and their attorneys, or the court may hold a hearing to determine the terms of the order.

What happens after the lawsuit is filed?

After a lawsuit is filed, both sides usually send each other "discovery" requests (mentioned earlier). We usually serve formal discovery requests on the other party along with our petition or our answer, which must be answered by the opposing party within a certain amount of time. These are written questions about assets, debts, children issues, marital and other history of the parties and requests for documentation related to all of the above. Full financial disclosure is required by law, and each side is allowed to discover what assets and debts exist. Occasionally, you may also have to give sworn testimony at a deposition. We are allowed to find out all of the above information about the opposing party as well.

After discovery is complete, we normally file an “at-issue” memorandum with the clerk’s office, which lets the court know that we are ready to have the case heard by the judge. We then schedule the case for a “4-way” meeting to see if it can be resolved without a trial. A 4-way meeting is where the parties and their attorneys get together and try to resolve as many issues as they can before going to trial.

If the 4-way meeting is unsuccessful all of the issues, the parties and the attorneys go to a settlement conference hearing. There, the judge will usually offer to assist the parties resolve any remaining issues, and if they cannot resolve all of the remaining issues, a trial is held before a judge. After the trial is over, the parties review the result to determine if an appeal is recommended.

How long does it take to get divorced in California?

Under California law there is a statutory "waiting period" of six months before the parties to a dissolution proceeding are legally returned to the status of single persons. The parties may not remarry until this waiting period has expired. In our practice we have found that most divorces require anywhere from six to nine months. However, depending on the complexity of the case and whether the parties can agree on major issues, it could take one year or even much more to resolve the divorce. It is almost always in the parties' best interest to resolve the case by agreement as quickly as possible in order avoid excessive legal fees and keep the time spent dealing with the divorce to a minimum. This allows both parties to save more of their money, reduces the emotional stress and allows the parties to move on with their lives as quickly as possible. A quick resolution will almost certainly help lessen the trauma on the parties' children.

Five Deadly Mistakes That Can Destroy Your Divorce Case

( ) — Sun, 03 Oct 2010 16:20:38 +0000

FIVE DEADLY MISTAKES THAT CAN DESTROY YOUR DIVORCE CASE

Sometimes unintentionally, and other times intentionally, people going through a divorce take certain actions which often times costs them dearly in their divorce. Here are the five most common that I see:

1. Waiting too long before seeking legal help.

California law requires that you follow certain procedures when you file for divorce as well as if you receive notice that your spouse has filed for divorce. There are acceptable forms you should use in filing a divorce petition, answering a petition that you have received and requesting information from the other party. There are also certain deadlines you must meet. Missing these deadlines can be fatal to your case. Therefore, it is crucial that you contact an attorney as soon as possible to avoid missing these deadlines.

2. Hiding your history (or that of your spouse or your child) from your attorney.

If you file for divorce, the opposing party usually has the right to obtain information from you regarding your financial, criminal, parental, substance abuse, medical and psychological history. Even if you do not give it to them voluntarily, they may be able to obtain it from other sources. If you hide or lie about any of these issues and it is discovered by the other side, your credibility is destroyed, and it will almost certainly damage your ability to get the outcome you want in your divorce. If you tell your attorney up-front about all prior history, he can evaluate whether or not it will be a problem for your case. However, your attorney cannot deal with an issue about which he or she does not know.

3. Hiding assets.

The quickest way to lose the assets you are entitled to in a divorce is by trying to hide assets, debts, etc. from the other side or the court. Most spouses have a general idea about what assets that exist in the marriage. Also, there are other ways for the opposing side to discover any assets that you do not disclose. You will usually get a reasonable division of assets if you are completely honest about your total financial situation. If you lie about it, you are inviting the court to punish you by giving your assets to your spouse.

4. Not working as a team with your attorney.

Although the attorney is in charge of preparing the case, he or she will need your help to do so. During the course of a divorce case, it is essential that your attorney be able to contact you and, when necessary, enlist your help in obtaining certain information and documents. You will also need to be available to assist your attorney by answering discovery requests (formal requests for documents and other information) from the other side, preparing for depositions and preparing for court hearings. The best attorney in the world cannot help you if you do not assist him in preparing your case.

5. Misbehaving in court or at a deposition.

When you go to court or to a deposition the rules are simple: tell the truth, dress appropriately (nice, conservative clothing), be polite, do not get angry, do not answer a question that is not asked, do not argue with the judge or the opposing attorney, if you do not know the answer to a question do not guess, and do not talk over someone who is speaking. Remember that when you go to trial, you are "Exhibit A". If the judge does not like you and does not believe you, they will look for a way to deny you what you are requesting, and you will lose. The way to be likable and believable is to assist your attorney in preparing ahead of time for your testimony, being completely honest at all times and being courteous to everyone involved in the case, including the opposing attorney. If you are obnoxious or do not tell the truth in court or even at a deposition, you will damage your case. If the judge likes you and believes your story, they will usually try to find a way to help you achieve the result you want, or at least a fair result. And, even if your case settles without a trial, being courteous honest with the opposing side and their attorney will usually yield a better result.

Cyberbullying: What to Do If it Happens to Your Teen

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Fri, 03 Sep 2010 11:32:30 +0000

Cyberbullying: What to Do If it Happens to Your Teen
April 8th, 2010 at 8:49 pm

Cyberbullying, using the Internet, cell phones, or another type of communication technology to hurt or embarrass others, is an increasingly common problem among today’s youth. In a recent study conducted by the National Crime Prevention Council (NCPC) and Harris Interactive Inc., more than 43% of teens ages 13-17 have experienced cyberbullying within the past year.

According to the Pew Internet and American Life Project, about 93% of teens use social media Web sites, and 55% of online teens have created a profile through social networking sites such as MySpace and Facebook. These sites allow teens to express their feelings online for the cyber world to view. Often motivated by anger, frustration or boredom, cyberbullies harass individuals by posting negative comments and pictures.

Cyberbullying, using the Internet, cell phones, or another type of communication technology to hurt or embarrass others, is an increasingly common problem among today’s youth. In a recent study conducted by the National Crime Prevention Council (NCPC) and Harris Interactive Inc., more than 43% of teens ages 13-17 have experienced cyberbullying within the past year.

According to the Pew Internet and American Life Project, about 93% of teens use social media Web sites, and 55% of online teens have created a profile through social networking sites such as MySpace and Facebook. These sites allow teens to express their feelings online for the cyber world to view. Often motivated by anger, frustration or boredom, cyberbullies harass individuals by posting negative comments and pictures.

Victims of cyberbullying usually feel a wide range of emotions, including indifference, anger and embarrassment. According to a study conducted by Fight Crime, only 35% of teens have told a parent about being cyberbullied; 16% have told no one.

Parents need to be aware of cyberbullying by monitoring their teen’s online activity. If a cyberbully harasses your teen, the California Association Marriage and Family Therapists offers the following tips for parents:

• Encourage your teen not to respond to the bullying.
• Save pictures and messages as evidence.
• Contact your teen’s school to report the cyberbullying.
• Closely monitor your teen’s computer use.
• Try to identify the individual doing the bullying.
• If possible, block the cyberbully from future contact.
• Try to contact the cyberbully’s parents, if possible.
• Contact the police or an attorney if cyberbullying becomes violent.
Cyberbullying should not be taken lightly. If your child is seriously troubled by a cyberbully and it affects his or her emotional or mental behavior, consider seeking professional help.

Source: The California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, with 27 chapters throughout the state, is an independent professional organization, representing the interests of licensed marriage and family therapists. CAMFT provides TherapistFinder.com as a resource to the public looking for marriage and family therapists located in California. www.camft.org.

Your Credit Score and Bankruptcy

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Fri, 03 Sep 2010 11:22:28 +0000

Your Credit Score and Bankruptcy
June 29th, 2010 at 10:19 am

It is not easy to decide to file for bankruptcy protection. What if you need a loan in the near future? Will your credit rating be so damaged that you won't qualify for a loan at a reasonable rate? The good news is that, most of the time, bankruptcy does not do as much damage to your credit score as you might expect. Long-term, it's usually possible to get your credit score high enough for you to get a loan that isn't a rip-off.

"If you sleep on the floor, you can't fall out of bed." If you are considering bankruptcy, your credit score is probably already low. Most likely, you have high balances, late payments, and other repayment problems. Therefore, your score might not go down much...

It is not easy to decide to file for bankruptcy protection. What if you need a loan in the near future? Will your credit rating be so damaged that you won't qualify for a loan at a reasonable rate?

The good news is that, most of the time, bankruptcy does not do as much damage to your credit score as you might expect. Long-term, it's usually possible to get your credit score high enough for you to get a loan that isn't a rip-off.

"If you sleep on the floor, you can't fall out of bed." If you are considering bankruptcy, your credit score is probably already low. Most likely, you have high balances, late payments, and other repayment problems. Therefore, your score might not go down much if you decide to file for bankruptcy protection.

Ironically, bankruptcy even gives some credit scores a small boost. When bankruptcy is declared, high balances, records of unpaid debts and late payments are usually removed. Accounts included in the bankruptcy will be marked as such.

When your credit score is calculated, you are compared to a group of consumers in a similar financial position. If you file bankruptcy, you will be compared with other people who filed for bankruptcy. Your financial behavior only has to be better than the average bankruptcy filer's to rise toward the top scores in your group! You won't get a perfect credit score while the bankruptcy is in place, but a score over 700 is in the realm of possibility.

Realistically, your credit score should be one of many things you weigh in deciding whether bankruptcy would be helpful -- or even possible. The rules about who can file for bankruptcy have tightened up, making it harder than ever to qualify for filing. If you can organize your financial world without bankruptcy, do it! If you are not sure, consult a bankruptcy attorney.

Divorce Attorney – Making Sure You Get What’s Fair

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Fri, 03 Sep 2010 11:19:52 +0000

Divorce Attorney – Making Sure You Get What’s Fair

No one gets married expecting to divorce. Unfortunately, over fifty percent of the couples that get married these days will end up in court fighting for legal separation. Some people were incompatible from the beginning. Others may have grown apart over the years. And still others may be dealing with issues of infidelity or spousal abuse. Whatever the reason that instigated the separation, you need to make sure you have someone in your court that will fight for your parental and financial rights. A divorce attorney can ensure that you get everything you are entitled to should you find yourself in the position of getting a divorce.

Even if the divorce is an amicable one, a divorce attorney can help you navigate the legal waters and make sure you don’t get taken advantage of by your ex-spouse or the court system. This is most often seen in the awarding of parental custody of children or the assigning of financial support.

Top 15 Myths About Bankruptcy

( ) — Fri, 13 Aug 2010 19:27:39 +0000

TOP 15 MYTHS OF BANKRUPTCY

1. YOU CAN’T FILE BANKRUPTCY UNDER THE NEW LAW

• No, THE 2005 REFORM ACT just made it more difficult and added a few SPEED BUMPS to overcome.
• This is why you need to consult a bankruptcy attorney before you do anything if you are in financial distress.

2. YOU MUST BE BEHIND IN YOUR BILLS OR BROKE TO FILE BANKRUPTCY

• No, do not wait until it is an emergency with bank restraints and wage garnishments.
• Figure out where you will be financially 6 months from now. Will it be better or worse?

3. YOU CAN’T WORK AND FILE BANKRUPTCY

•    No, the starting point is the MEDIAN INCOME set in the Means Test under the new law
which is currently $47,969 for single person
•    $64,647 for family of 2
•    $86,694 for family of 5 in CA
•    Each state is different
•    This is just a starting point. Certain expenses will qualify you.

4. YOU WILL LOSE MY HOME IF YOU FILE BANKRUPTCY

• NO: each state has different protection for homes
• *CA HAS $75,000 HOMESTEAD PROTECTION FOR EQUITY FOR AN INDIVIDUAL AND $100,000 PROTECTION FOR COUPLES

5. IT WILL DESTROY MY CREDIT IF I FILE FOR BANKRUPTCY MY CREDIT SCORE WILL GO DOWN

•    Let’s face it: most clients already have bad credit
•    Question is: What are you going to do about your debt?
•    Most credit scores will actually go UP after filing bankruptcy

6. YOU WILL NEVER GET ANOTHER JOB OR BE ABLE TO RENT AN APARTMENT OR HOUSE

•    You have a better chance of landing that job if you take action to fix your finances
•    Employers do not want harassment at work or wage garnishments to deal with
•    Landlords want tenants who can use their salary to pay rent, not the Sheriff or credit cards

7. IF YOU FILE BANKRUPTCY, MIGHT AS WELL MAX OUT CREDIT CARDS

•    DON’T DO IT! Stop using the cards and stop paying them and see a consumer bankruptcy attorney;
•    Maxing out your cards will create more problems in your bankruptcy filing, and may lead to a claim of bad faith;
•    Bankruptcy is meant for the UNFORTUNATE but HONEST debtor

8. YOU SHOULD DO ANYTHING TO AVOID BANKRUPTCY INCLUDING CASHING
IN 401K OR RETIREMENT FUNDS

•    WRONG! Your retirement funds are protected - don’t use them to pay debts that can be discharged!
•    And, you will probably be taxed and penalized on retirement withdrawals by the IRS!
•    Don’t listen to those Cable T.V. Talkingheads who tell you to cash in your retirement!

9. IMMIGRATION STATUS WILL BE AFFECTED AND YOU WILL NEVER BECOME A CITIZEN

• NOT TRUE: Filing bankruptcy is NOT a crime and will NOT affect your Green Card or
CITIZENSHIP!!

10. THOSE T.V. TALKING HEADS ON CABLE KNOW WHAT THEY ARE TALKING
ABOUT WHEN THEY SAY

•    Cash in your retirement
•    Do anything to avoid Bankruptcy
•    Don’t talk to a Bankruptcy Attorney

11. THOSE DEBT MANAGEMENT SERVICES ADVERTISED ON TV AND RADIO
WORK!

• NO! If you pay the Debt Management Plan and do not pay your creditors, you will probably be sued by the creditor
• Most Debt Management Services are being investigated by the Attorney Generals

12. YOU CAN KEEP 1 CREDIT CARD (JUST DON’T TELL YOUR BANKRUPTCY
ATTORNEY)

• No. Bankruptcy gives you a Fresh Start. You need to list all of your debts.
• Warning! You will probably start receiving a lot of unsolicited credit offers in the mail after your bankruptcy. You should open them standing over your trash can. The credit companies will be lining up to get you back in the credit trap. Don’t fall for it!

13. YOU CAN’T AFFORD TO FILE BANKRUPTCY

•    Most bankruptcy attorneys have payment plans
•    In Chapter 13, most of the fees can be paid through the plan payments
•    You are generally instructed to stop all credit card payments freeing up money for fees
14. YOU ARE A FAILURE IF YOU FILE BANKRUPTCY

• Studies show that bankruptcies are generally caused BY EMPLOYMENT PROBLEMS, HEALTH PROBLEMS, and/or MARRIAGE PROBLEMS. There have been many famous people who have filed for bankruptcy throughout U.S. history. (Watch the video on my bankruptcy website to learn more.)

15. YOU HAVE TO PAY EVERYTHING BACK ANYWAY, SO WHY FILE BANKRUPTCY

•    In A Chapter 7 bankruptcy debts are wiped out with the exception of certain taxes, child
    support/alimony and student loans
•    In Chapter 13 you pay back debts that must be paid, such as certain taxes, student loans, and mortgage arrears (if you are keeping the house).

Is a Revocable Living Trust Right For Me?

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 13:41:52 +0000

No one wants to think about dying or becoming incapacitated. However, we are responsible for having our affairs in order, should something happen. We know that we need will in case of our death. But what if you get sick or injured, and become incapacitated? If you have a revocable living trust, the guidelines in the trust it will go into effect, should you be alive but incapacitated.

In legal lingo, you would be called the "grantor" and would act as your own trustee. But if you became incapacitated, your "successor trustee" would start controlling your assets. The successor trustee can be a trust company, a bank or another person (such as a family member).

Maybe you have heard nightmare stories about probate. Probate is a legal process in that often happens when someone with a will dies. A judge decides which creditors need to get paid from the remaining assets. Probate can take a long time, 6 - 24 months, during which time the assets may be frozen. Probate is a public process and the fight can go on a long time.

The nice part about revocable living trusts is that assets in a living trust are included in the Probate process. The trustee handles the details, so the probate court does not have to. Asset distribution is private, so it is finished quickly.

"Revocable" means you can change it when you want. This gives you some flexibility, because you can make changes to it as you go along. When you get new assets, you can put them into the trust (unless you do not mind them ending up in Probate court).

Maybe you have heard there are tax advantages to trusts, but a revocable living trust does not have such advantages. This is because you can change the trust.

Another positive point about living trusts is that you can control who gets what, and when they get it. For example, you might distribute a set amount of money each year for the upkeep of your minor children, and make a larger distribution when they are college age (to help pay for their education). Or you may worry that your adult beneficiaries will behave irresponsibly if they inherit all your assets at once. The living trust will allow you to be specific about when the assets will be released, according to a schedule or certain conditions.

Trusts can cost more than 10 times as much as wills, but you will be avoiding Probate, which can get expensive. You still need a will in case you forget to put new assets into the living trust. Also, the guardian of minor children cannot be named in a trust.

Typically, a living trust is a good thing for people who own a business or rental property, whose assets exceed $50K, and people with a great deal of wealth. People who probably do not need a living trust are individuals or childless couples who have very few assets, and people who want the court to supervise their estate after they die.

You should check with your legal counsel to find out if a living trust is right for your situation.

Can You Discharge Student Loans through Bankruptcy?

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 09:17:57 +0000

After accumulating student loan debt, sometimes consumers get into financial trouble. They leave school and get a job, but get in over their heads with their finances. Their student loan repayments are just one of many bills that pile up and out-match their ability to pay. At that moment, they may consider bankruptcy protection. Since their student loans are "debt," they may believe that these loans will certainly be wiped out in the bankruptcy. However, the chances of this happening are slim, and they may have alternatives for managing their student loans.

Student (educational) loans may include the Federal Stafford, Federal PLUS, and/or private loans. Over time, the law has become increasingly restrictive about who can include these loans in a bankruptcy. Educational loans are in the non-dischargeable category except in cases of "undue hardship."

The test for undue hardship usually involves finding out if, based on current income and expenses, the consumer cannot both maintain a minimal standard of living and pay back the student loans. This problem would have to be likely to continue for much of the student loan repayment period (such as having a disability). And consumer would have to have made efforts in good faith to repay the loans. Many consumers would fail this test.

In some situations, it is possible that part of the student loans may be discharged, but this is not guaranteed.
Consolidating student loans with the federal government can be helpful, if the consumer can get "hardship deferments." Many lenders will work with the consumer to find an affordable repayment plan.

Bankruptcy is not an easy way to get rid of student loans. The best way to avoid this problem is to minimize costs while in school by getting as scholarships and grants, and attending public colleges or universities for at least part of the degree. Living expenses can be mitigated by living with parents. If the student loans have already been incurred, submit paperwork (such as hardship deferments) and make payments on time to avoid going into default. If paying the bills is a problem, get free financial counseling from a local government agency, and consult an attorney who specializes in bankruptcy law.

Your Credit Score and Bankruptcy

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 10:48:18 +0000

It is not easy to decide to file for bankruptcy protection. What if you need a loan in the near future? Will your credit rating be so damaged that you won't qualify for a loan at a reasonable rate?

About the author: Rick D. Banks is a bankruptcy attorney in Frescno, California.

Divorce Attorney – Making Sure You Get What’s Fair

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 13:54:39 +0000

No one gets married expecting to divorce. Unfortunately, over fifty percent of the couples that get married these days will end up in court fighting for legal separation. Some people were incompatible from the beginning. Others may have grown apart over the years. And still others may be dealing with issues of infidelity or spousal abuse. Whatever the reason that instigated the separation, you need to make sure you have someone in your court that will fight for your parental and financial rights. A divorce attorney can ensure that you get everything you are entitled to should you find yourself in the position of getting a divorce.

Even if the divorce is an amicable one, a divorce attorney can help you navigate the legal waters and make sure you don’t get taken advantage of by your ex-spouse or the court system. This is most often seen in the awarding of parental custody of children or the assigning of financial support. A knowledgeable attorney can anticipate problems you may encounter during your divorce and steer you around them so that you get custody or support orders which are fair to both you and your children. This is particularly helpful when you and your ex have differing opinions about how property, money, and the needs of the kids should be handled.

Divorce is an emotionally charged process that can, and does, incite aggression in both parties. You need someone who is levelheaded and emotionally neutral to negotiate on your behalf. Make no mistake. Your divorce attorney will work hard to produce an outcome that is beneficial to you. However, they will be doing it from an objective viewpoint that avoids the rash decisions many couples make in the heat of a bitter divorce. When you are angry over something your spouse said or did, you want to have a person on your side that can calmly resolve the issue and put out the fire.

Hiring a divorce attorney to help you with your separation is a smart choice, particularly when there is quite a bit of assets are involved. Your lawyer can help you get your fair share of community property, uncover assets your spouse may be trying to hide or prevent your ex partner from taking stuff that they do not rightfully have a stake in. Getting a divorce is a major event that will impact the rest of your life. Make sure you have someone on your side helping to ensure you get the best fresh start you can.

One Minute Can Change Your Relationship

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 15:30:19 +0000

By Rita Esterly, Ph.D.

Have you ever thought about how important greetings and good-byes are in a relationship? Greetings set the stage for how interactions develop. The two major times when you either create a loving environment or a conflicted environment are when you awake in the morning and when you both come together after a long day of working either at an office or at home.

We'll start with the morning greetings and good-byes. When you wake your partner, be gentle and loving. That means, give a gentle touch and make your voice be soft and warm. This is respectful of your partner. Loud and rough is rude. Make your first words be loving words. For example, touch him gently and say something like, "Wake up, it's time to add joy to the day." Or touch her gently and say, "Wake up, the day will be brighter with you in it." Now, these things may be far different than what you have said in the past; however, they are only words. Your words! Words can be combined in any way to create a warm feeling in someone else. Use your words to wake your partner up each day to the joy of hearing you say wonderful things about him or her. Whoever awakens first, wake the other one if you are there when it is time for him or her to wake up. An alarm clock is fine for the first one who arises and when one partner is away. However, make it a point to wake each other. Look into his or her eyes. Make eye contact and smile. Sharing a hug at that time. Even a gentle kiss would be the loving thing to do. The important thing is make some kind of contact with your touch, your eyes, and your voice. After awakening, then discuss what is happening for each of you that day. Share something like, "Today that big report is due and I will present the results this afternoon about one o'clock. Send good thoughts my way about that time."

Whoever is going out the door first, always find your partner, look him or her in the eyes, and say a goodbye and give some kind of touch such as a hug or a goodbye kiss. Again, words, eye contact, and touch are very important. That seems easy, but it is not. When each person is busy, a thousand thoughts about the day can distract a person from doing that simple little thing that only takes less than a minute, but connects the two of you for the rest of the day. So you need to concentrate on saying goodbye each day until it becomes a habit. Even if you have to write it down on a sticky note and post it on the door, do it.

Let's discuss the greeting you give when you come together in the evening after working all day. As you drive or walk home, or just before you know your partner is on his or her way home, take a minute to clear your mind of all the business of the day to prepare your mind for focusing on the other. The best way to do this is to take three very big deep breaths and let your mind slow down. Clear your mind of everything you did not finish that day. This is like putting the thoughts in a file cabinet that you can open again on your way to work the next day. Then picture the image of your partner. Dwell on that for about one minute. Then think of one exciting thing you want to share with him or her when you meet. Have this in mind when you walk through the door or hear the car in the driveway. Now you are prepared to either walk through the door or greet your partner as he or she walks through the door. Here is the sequence of events you can choose to make your entry a wonderful experience.

First, smile. No matter what has happened that day, make eye contact and smile for your partner because you are happy to see him or her. Second, make physical contact so use some form of touch. Hug or kiss your partner and really put some effort into it. Then make verbal contact by asking a few questions about your partner's day. Reveal some exciting information about your day. Lastly, do what we call "future pace." That means, ask what your partner has planned for the evening. This sets the stage for positive interactions.

Let's review. First smile and make eye contact with your partner. Second, make physical contact by touching your partner is some way. Third, make verbal contact by asking some questions about your partner's day and then share a part of your day with your partner. Fourth, future pace by planning the evening.

Remember, your response to what your partner says when you first walk into each other's worlds after being apart all day will either make the rest of the evening wonderful or conflicted. Which would you rather have in your life?

I have just given you a way to make your relationship connected and your marriage peaceful. So it's up to you to learn this technique or not. That's the great part of life; being able to choose your own behavior and therefore, your interactions that either get you to your goal or not. Your goal in this case is creating harmony with your partner to make a peaceful household, one that you look forward to coming home to each night and awakening to each morning. Will you choose harmony?

For more re-romancing tips, go to www.YesYouCanChoose.com. Dr. Rita Esterly is a psychologist and strengths coach in private practice with a specialty in marriage and family therapy.

Chapter 7 – Is this the Right Bankruptcy Filing For You?

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Mon, 31 May 2010 17:26:04 +0000

If you are suffering under a mountain of debt with collection agents hounding you day and night, then the only option you may have to end that stress is to file for bankruptcy. The protection that bankruptcy offers can be a life saver to people who have fallen on hard times. The creditors will stop calling, foreclosure proceedings will be halted, and you will have a chance to make a fresh start. But just as important as making the decision to file for bankruptcy is determining which one is the best option for you: Chapter 7 or Chapter 13.

A Chapter 7 bankruptcy filing is a petition to the court to eliminate all eligible debts on the table. This type of filing is actually called a liquidation bankruptcy because some of your assets may be sold to pay creditors.

A Chapter 13 filing is a request to reorganize the petitioner’s debts. This type of filing is called a "reorganization bankruptcy," or "wage earner's plan," because you pay a monthly amount set by the court and that money is disbursed to creditors. You can take up to five years to pay off all your debt under this plan.

The most common type of filing is a Chapter 7 and with good reason. With the ability to completely wipe the slate clean, this option offers people a way to completely start over anew. However, there are a couple of drawbacks to this option. First, you have to wait eight years before you can file another liquidation bankruptcy. Second, there is a means test you have to pass in order to qualify. Basically, your yearly income must be less than the state median income. If it is over that amount, you may be forced into filing a Chapter 13. Lastly, you may have to sell assets that exceed the protection of the law.

However, Chapter 7 can also help you hold onto to assets you want to keep. If you want to keep your home or your car and continue making payments on them after the bankruptcy, then that is entirely possible. This is one of many defense options available to people facing foreclosure or repossession of property. The best way to decide if this type of bankruptcy is a good fit for your situation is to speak to a knowledgeable bankruptcy attorney. If you live in the Fresno/Central San Joaquin Valley area of California, the Law Office of Rick D. Banks offers a free consultation to help you decide if Chapter 7 bankruptcy protection is right for you.

Life After Bankruptcy

( ) — Mon, 31 May 2010 17:23:38 +0000

There are many reasons why people file for bankruptcy. Most people live paycheck to paycheck and are dumped into financial ruin because of a job loss. Other people experience unforeseen medical troubles and get buried underneath a mountain of doctor bills. And yes, there are those people who try to live a champagne life on a beer budget with nothing but supersized credit card debt to show for their efforts. Regardless of the reason for filing, after the process has completed and you receive your discharge papers in the mail, it is time to start rebuilding your life after bankruptcy.

The first step is to evaluate what led to the bankruptcy in the first place. This will give you clues as to how to prevent a repeat of the situation. If the problem stemmed from living paycheck to paycheck, then your goal should be to have an emergency savings fund for unexpected expenses. If poor money management skills were at the heart of your trip to the courts, then investing in a book or course that will teach you how to handle your money would be well worth the expense. Sit down with your significant other and have an honest discussion about what happened and what you each can do to ensure a more stable financial future.

Having good credit is a necessity in this day and age, so your next goal is to work on rebuilding your credit profile. In the past, starting over after bankruptcy was very difficult as no one wanted to take a chance on someone with that kind of mark on their credit report. However, today you’ll find any number of programs that will help you get back on your feet. Understand, though, that you will be paying premium interest rates on any credit that is extended to you until your credit score improves.

Get your credit report and clean up any errors that may be on it. Then look for places that will grant you credit. Often this means opening a secured credit card or getting an auto loan through a high risk lender. Once you obtain credit, pay your bills on time. This is critical. While lenders consider your whole credit profile, more weight is placed on your most recent credit activity. Therefore, current day credit that is good will usually trump old credit that is bad. Taking a class on credit management will be extremely helpful in your quest to rebuild your credit after bankruptcy.

Can You Settle Your Credit Card Debts?

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 12:28:27 +0000

Consumers with overwhelming credit card debt may be tempted to seek help from "debt settlement" or "debt consolidation" companies that promise to erase their debt for pennies on the dollar, but the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), the nation's consumer protection agency, urges caution when dealing with these companies.

Debt settlement companies claim they can negotiate with your creditors to reduce the amount you owe. Some say they can arrange for your debt to be paid off for a much lower amount--anywhere from 30 to 75 percent of the balance you owe the creditor.

Be cautious! There is no guarantee that debt settlement companies can convince a credit card company to accept partial payment of a debt. Even if they can, you still need to set aside money each month for your creditors and pay the huge fees that debt settlement companies charge before they settle any of your debts.

Additionally, you may have to pay a final fee to a debt settlement company which is a percentage of the money they've supposedly saved you. In the meantime, it may be months--or even years--before the debt settlement company negotiates with your credit card company to settle your debts. And, if you stop making your payments to the creditors while you're waiting, the credit card company will usually add late fees and interest to the debt each month. That can cause your original debt amount to double or triple.

What to Do When You're in a Hole

The FTC suggests that the first thing you should do if you are having trouble paying your credit card debt is contact your credit card company and try to negotiate a settlement. Even if they have denied you before, it's still worth making another phone call. Nothing ventured, nothing gained!

Another option is to contact a credit counselor. Reputable credit counseling organizations (another word of caution - check with the Better Business Bureau) advise people on managing money, bills, help them develop a budget, and usually offer free information.

If you decide to pay a company to negotiate your debt, do some research before agreeing to pay them any money. Again, search the company on the Better Business Burea’s website (www.bbb.com) before you make any commitment.

Red Flags to Watch For:

The FTC suggests it's best to avoid any company that promises to settle your debt if it:

talks about a "new government program" to bail out personal credit card debt;
"guarantees" it can make your debt go away;
tells you to stop communicating with your creditors;
says it can stop all debt collection calls and lawsuits;
guarantees that your debts can be paid off for pennies on the dollar;
requires that you pay its full fee within the first few months.

Another option is to erase your debt entirely and get a "fresh start" by filing for bankruptcy protection. You can usually save all of your property, and eliminate all of your debt.

Cyberbullying: What to Do If it Happens to Your Teen

( ) — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 21:02:40 +0000

Cyberbullying, using the Internet, cell phones, or another type of communication technology to hurt or embarrass others, is an increasingly common problem among today’s youth. In a recent study conducted by the National Crime Prevention Council (NCPC) and Harris Interactive Inc., more than 43% of teens ages 13-17 have experienced cyberbullying within the past year.

• Encourage your teen not to respond to the bullying.
• Save pictures and messages as evidence.
• Contact your teen’s school to report the cyberbullying.
• Closely monitor your teen’s computer use.
• Try to identify the individual doing the bullying.
• If possible, block the cyberbully from future contact.
• Try to contact the cyberbully’s parents, if possible.
• Contact the police or an attorney if cyberbullying becomes violent.

Cyberbullying should not be taken lightly. If your child is seriously troubled by a cyberbully and it affects his or her emotional or mental behavior, consider seeking professional help.

Ten Facts about Mortgage Debt Forgiveness

( ) — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 20:33:06 +0000

The Internal Revenue Service has some important information about mortgage debt forgiveness that may be important to you if your mortgage debt was partly or entirely forgiven during tax years 2007 through 2012. If you fall into that category, you may be able to claim special tax relief and exclude the debt forgiven from your income. Here are 10 facts the IRS wants you to know about Mortgage Debt Forgiveness.

1. Normally, debt forgiveness results in taxable income. However, under the Mortgage Forgiveness Debt Relief Act of 2007, you may be able to exclude up to $2 million of debt forgiven on your principal residence.

2. The limit is $1 million for a married person filing a separate return.

3. You may exclude debt reduced through mortgage restructuring, as well as mortgage debt forgiven in a foreclosure.

4. To qualify, the debt must have been used to buy, build or substantially improve your principal residence and be secured by that residence.

5. Refinanced debt proceeds used for the purpose of substantially improving your principal residence also qualify for the exclusion.

6. Proceeds of refinanced debt used for other purposes – for example, to pay off credit card debt – do not qualify for the exclusion.

7. If you qualify, claim the special exclusion by filling out Form 982, Reduction of Tax Attributes Due to Discharge of Indebtedness, and attach it to your federal income tax return for the tax year in which the qualified debt was forgiven.

8. Debt forgiven on second homes, rental property, business property, credit cards or car loans does not qualify for the tax relief provision. In some cases, however, other tax relief provisions – such as insolvency – may be applicable. IRS Form 982 provides more details about these provisions.

9. If your debt is reduced or eliminated you normally will receive a year-end statement, Form 1099-C, Cancellation of Debt, from your lender. By law, this form must show the amount of debt forgiven and the fair market value of any property foreclosed.

10. Examine the Form 1099-C carefully. Notify the lender immediately if any of the information shown is incorrect. You should pay particular attention to the amount of debt forgiven in Box 2 as well as the value listed for your home in Box 7.

Why you should not be Ashamed if you have to File Bankruptcy

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Fri, 13 Aug 2010 19:34:05 +0000

Everybody is struggling. We are all exasperated with endless debt issues. Debt is difficult to handle and even more stressful are the problems that typically complement the financial suffering. It’s like the “domino effect.” If we have lost our jobs, then everything is affected, we panic and become desperate, and soon we see our savings dwindle. We have been tempted to rob our 401K, but we know better. Most likely, we have already second mortgages on our home and borrowed money from our family. We can’t stop it; we are going further into debt.

We have done everything we can think of: cut up our credit cards, scaled down our groceries, stopped eating out and taking our family to movies. We have cut our budget to the core; we don’t know what to do next. Bankruptcy seems as the last resort, but we're devastated and scared; we feel ashamed and guilty, but we shouldn’t be because filing for bankruptcy can actually improve our financial situation. As a bankruptcy attorney, I hope that articles like this one can help remove the stigma on the proceedings.

In the past bankruptcy has had a bad taste for most of us; but today the old stigma attached to bankruptcy is dissolving as everyone is reaching out to catch the life preserver before drowning. If anything the recession has taught us is that if big corporations, banks, and businesses can go bankrupt, anybody can. Another thing we've learned is that it is not necessarily our fault.

We may have had a pre-existing illness that disqualifies from getting medical insurance. We may be victims of the financial bubble, created by a questionable real estate market, selling mortgages for overpriced homes with nothing down and interest only payments. In times when consumer debt is at an all time high, overwhelming debt can challenge the affluent.

Many want to escape from a situation that seems impossible to handle or to get relief from bad thoughts or feelings. People might be trying to escape feelings of rejection, hurt, or loss. Some people may be worried about disappointing friends or family members. And some may feel unwanted, unloved, victimized, or like they’re a burden to others. But isn't that what bankruptcy was legislated for - to give us a chance to start again, to give us some relief?

The government created the Bankruptcy code in order to give people with insurmountable debt a chance to "Start Over.” I understand you may feel ashamed of your situation but it is most likely not your fault. We all make mistakes, and most of us make mistakes managing our money; we seem to learn to manage our money the hard way. Bankruptcy is a legal proceeding that allows individuals to begin again without managing their debt obligations. Bankruptcy promises to cease all financial stress, and suggest a way out with less to pay, thus eliminate all debt issues.

The most important message I could give anyone is not to be ashamed of having to file. Whether the cause was overuse of credit cards or through a loss of job or medical emergency, this is a way to start. Don't destroy business or financial records. Doing so can impair your right to a discharge.

I can help you stop the phone calls and get creditors off your back. Bankruptcy is helpful for those who have a lot of unsecured debt, in other words, debt that is not secured by an asset, such as a car, or a house or other property. With Chapter 7, most debts are discharged, except for taxes, liens, and other debts that the law does not allow to be dismissed.

To evaluate whether you are eligible to file bankruptcy, I will complete several schedules of your income, debts, assets, expenses, and other document necessary to complete the schedules. The eligibility is not determined solely on the amount of your debts or income. It is all taken into consideration with a means test. Prior to filing Chapter 7 Bankruptcy, you must attend a credit counseling class. With Chapter 13 reorganization (debt repayment plan), I can help you work out a payment plan so that you can keep your home and your car.

Bankruptcy Lawyer Rick D. Banks is here to help you. With my extensive experience in bankruptcy, I know this complicated area of law well. You don't have to go through this alone. Let me help STOP collections, home foreclosures, repossessions and garnishments. Let me help you through this difficult decision if bankruptcy is right for you. I can help guide you to a fresh new start by reducing or eliminating your debt.

If you are like so many other Americans today who cannot pay their mounting debt, If you don't know what to do and are entirely lost, tired and not knowing what to do, you can. I will consider your situation from every aspect, ask you some questions, and probably will give you some practical advice.

If you have any questions, don't hesitate to contact me. If you're afraid you'll never be able to pay off your debt, and you'd like to explore some alternatives, don't hesitate to call. I offer free, confidential consultations to all potential clients.

Rick D. Banks, Attorney at Law

776 E. Shaw Ave., Suite 206

Fresno, CA 93710

(559) 222-4831

www.CentralValleyLaw.com

20 Do's And Dont's With Divorce

rickyd0857@msn.com (Rick Banks) — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 09:55:00 +0000

I can tell you from experience that when word gets out that you are battling a divorce, people come out of the woodwork with all sorts of advice. Some of it may be genuine, but most of it is just crap. The problem is how are you supposed to know what exactly needs to be done in order to protect your assets and your family. Like it or not, the woman/man that you married is not the same woman/man that you are divorcing. There is a sort of "survival mode" that kicks in and they become a completely different person. If the person becomes hell bent on getting everything he/she can, I guarantee that they have an attorney that promises to get it for them. So almost immediately you have to kick it into defensive mode as fast as you can.

This is why I have put together a series of Do's and Don'ts that you can put some faith in. This is highly researched information. Information that you can find in places all over the internet. Later on, I will show you some of the best resources that I have come across during my ordeal.

First off there are the Do's...

1) Close joint accounts and credit cards

2) Try for a reasonable out-of-court settlement

3) Make sure your children (if any) know that you are not divorcing them

4) Keep good records of all information pertinent to the divorce

5) Do tons of research when it comes to finding a good divorce attorney

6) Attend all court dates, even if your attorney says that you don't have to be there!

7) Keep a good tab on your attorney's fees and try to estimate your spouse's fees

8) Try as hard as you can to work out a visitation schedule so you can keep your kids from having to appear in court!

9) Understand that you are going through one hell of a test here...the stress and anxiety is completely normal. (In fact, divorcing individuals are more likely to give in to life's problems, which unfortunately can lead to other more serious problems)

10) Always honor your agreement (even if you ex violates it)...this is very important if you end up have to go back in front of the judge.

These Don'ts are just as important...

1) Move from the house unless you are ordered to by the courts.

2) Ever try to turn your kids against their other parent.

3) Be afraid to ask your lawyer all the questions you want, and dump them if he/she is not working for you!

4) Ever deal with your spouse and her/his lawyer unless your lawyer is present.

5) Let anger take over during any part of the proceedings!!

6) Sign anything unless you understand every single word.

7) Agree to pay alimony unless you fully understand the terms (e.g., termination date, whether it’s modifiable if your financial situation changes, etc.).

8) Shut yourself off from friends and family... An ongoing social life is very important.

9) Stop paying child support even if your ex is denying you time with your children. This is something that should be dealt with in court!

10) Forget that you, as a parent, have rights too!!!

Unfortunately, this doesn't cover everything. There is no article that could possibly do that. Every point that I have made has greater details that you need to find out about. Consider the issue of finding a good attorney, which is often much harder that you would think. It is possibly the most important decision you make, but still the hardest one.

I went through my own divorce many years ago. Fortunately, my ex and I were both fairly civil to each other, and our goal was to do what was best for our child. The end result was that I was able to survive the process without losing my shirt (although she did keep the house). The bottom line was, our daughter came through the divorce virtually unscathed. If at all possible, I encourage all couples to strive to have a "friendly divorce." You’ll save your sanity, and thousands of dollars in the process.

The best advice that I can give to you is don't ever give in. Do your homework! Find a really good attorney, and don't do anything foolish! You can go to my site and find more information and strategies, and the resources that I have used. Good luck to you and remember this doesn't have to be the end of your life!